Joke #5158

What's the best thing about a Siamese twin baby? Threesomes.
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A ship with 30 sailors and one woman strands on a desert island. After one month the woman says: "I can not proceed in this way." And she suicides herself. After another month, the sailors say: "We can not proceed in this way." And they bury the woman. The next month, the sailors say: "We can not proceed in this way." And they dig up the woman.
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More jokes about: black humor, death, desert island, disgusting, navy
Three flies in a trashcan get trapped overnight in a bathroom. The first fly goes to the sink, the second fly stays in the tub, and the third fly chooses the toilet. The next morning, all the exhausted flies gather back in the garbage can. The first fly says, "I'm exhausted! I almost got washed down the drain." The second fly says, "I almost got squashed by feet in the shower!" The third fly says, "The toilet was fine until it suddenly got dark. First, I heard thunder, then it started to rain, and if it weren't for that big brown log, I surely would have drowned."
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Some advice for guys: When the red river's flowin', take the dirt road.
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A man working with an electric saw accidentally saws off all 10 fingers. He rushes to the emergency room. The doctor says, "Give me the fingers and I'll see what I can do." "But I don't have the fingers!" "Why didn't you bring the fingers?!" asks the incredulous doctor. "Doc, I couldn't pick them up."
Vote: has 59.19 % from 15 votes. Send joke:

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A waitress walks up to a man to take his order. "I'd like to get the turtle soup, please." The waitress walks off to go get his order, but the man changes his mind and decides he wants the pea soup instead. "Hold the turtle, make it pea!"
Vote: has 57.36 % from 11 votes. Send joke:

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Q: What does it look like when you microwave a baby? A: I don't know, I close my eyes when I masturbate.
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What does a cannibal eat with cheese? Pickled organs.
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"Mommy, Mommy! Where have all your scabs gone?" "Shut up and eat your corn flakes."
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There was a horny young lady named Lil, Who fucked dynamite sticks for a thrill. They found her vagina In North Carolina And bits of her tits in Brazil!
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Q: What's brown and taps on the window? A: A baby in a microwave!
Vote: has 48.02 % from 11 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: baby, disgusting