What’s harder to do than nailing a baby to a tree?
Nailing it to a dead puppy.
Vote:
Similar jokes
See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.
Q: How do you know when it's bedtime at Michael Jackson's house?
A: The big hand touches the little one.
Vote:
Q: How can you tell if you're in a gay church?
A: Only half the congregation is kneeling.
Vote:
What's black, smells and has 17 tits?
The bin bags outside the breast cancer ward.
Vote:
Do you know what would be sick?
If you sat in Santa's lap and you felt him get a boner.
Do you know what would be even worse?
If he stood up and you were still sitting in his lap.
Vote:
What is funnier than a zombie baby hanging from a ceiling fan?
Hitting it with a shovel when it comes around.
Vote:
At a rally John McCain was asked if he wore boxers or briefs.
He replied, "Depends."
Vote:
Why did President Clinton name his dog Buddy instead of Spot?
Because he didn't want people running around the White House saying, "come Spot, come Spot!"
Vote:
One day two boys were walking through the woods when they saw some rabbit turds.
One of the boys said, "What is that?"
"They're smart pills," said the other boy.
"Eat them and they'll make you smarter."
So he ate them and said, "These taste like crap."
"See," said the other boy, "you're getting smarter already."
Vote:
Why does the witch not wear panties when flying?
Because she wants to get a better grip on the broom.
Vote:
Three guys compare their levels of intoxication from a party the previous night.
The first guy says, "Man, I was so drunk last night, I went home and blew chunks."
The second guy says, "I was so drunk last night, I woke up this morning on my front porch."
The third guy says, "I was so drunk last night, I took a prostitute home to my wife."
The first guy exclaims, "You guys don't understand! Chunks is my dog!"