Why did the blonde tiptoe past the medicine cabinet?
Because she didn't want to wake the sleeping pills.
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Q: Why would a blonde wear green lipstick?
A: Because red means Stop.
A blonde asks a bypasser:
Excuse me, would you tell me where the other side of the road is?
It's on the other side.
Strange.. When I was on the other side, people told me it's here...
There was a blonde who was sitting next to a lawyer on an airplane.
The lawyer was naturally bored, so he kept bugging the blonde to play a game of intelligence with him.
The blonde was reluctant, so the lawyer offered her 10 to 1 odds.
He told her that every time she could not answer his question, she owed him $5, but every time he could not answer hers, he'd give her $50.
The lawyer figured the blonde was so dumb, he could not lose, and the blonde thought for a few minutes and reluctantly accepted to play his game.
The lawyer fires his first question "What is the distance between the Earth and the nearest star?"
Without saying a word the blonde handed him $5.
The blonde then asked the lawyer "What goes up a hill with 3 legs and comes back down the hill with 4 legs?"
The lawyer's face looked extremely puzzled.
He spent several hours, looking up everything he could on his laptop and even placing numerous air-to-ground phone calls trying to figure out the answer.
Finally, the angry and frustrated lawyer handed the blonde $50.00.
The blonde put the $50 into her purse quickly without saying a word.
The lawyer was outraged at this point and asked, "Well, what is answer?"
The blonde glanced at him with a smirk on her face and handed him a $5 bill.
One day three women went camping - a blonde, a brunette and a redhead.
The blonde suddenly had to go to the bathroom.
She went into the woods with her toilet paper and did her business.
While she was gone, the brunette and the redhead decided to play a joke on her.
They skinned a rabbit and snuck up on the blonde, put the guts behind her and ran back to the campsite. Three minutes later they heard a scream.
Then they waited another half an hour and the blonde came back, sweating.
She said, "I had to poop so hard I pooped my guts out. But thanks to God and these two fingers, I stuffed them back in."
Why did the blonde stand in front of the mirror with her eyes closed?
She wanted to see what she looked like asleep.
A blonde who got a fishing rod for her birthday decided to go ice fishing to make good use of her gift.
Early the next morning, she got all her gear together and headed out to the ice.
When she reached her final destination, she cut a large hole in the ice and dipped the rod in.
Then suddenly she heard a voice that said: “There are no fish in there”.
So she moves to another spot and cuts another hole, but then the same voice spoke again and told her there were no fish in there.
So she moves again, and the voice tells her there are no fish in there.
So she looks up and sees an irritated man staring down at her.
“How do you know there are no fish there?” asks the blonde.
So the man cooly says “Well first of all, this is a hockey rink, and second of all, you’re going to have to pay for those holes.”
Two blondes are on opposite sides of a lake.
One blonde yells to the other, "How do you get to the other side?"
"You are on the other side," the other blonde yells back.
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Q. Why do blondes wash their hair in the sink?
A. Because, that's where you're supposed to wash vegetables!
Q: Why are only 2% of blondes touch-typists?
A: The rest are hunting peckers.