Joke #5367

Joe is on his last day at work as a mailman. He receives many thank-you cards and monetary gifts along his route. When he gets to the very last house, he is greeted by a gorgeous housewife, who invites him in for lunch. Joe happily accepts. After lunch, the woman invites him up to the bedroom for some "desert." Joe happily accepts again. When they are done, the woman gives him a dollar. Joe asks what the dollar is all about. The woman replies: "It was my husband's suggestion. When I told him that it was your last day at work, he told me 'F**k him, give him a dollar. The lunch was my idea."
Vote: has 85.87 % from 288 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

Q. Why doesn't Santa have any children? A. Because he only comes once a year, and when he does, it's down the chimney.
Vote: has 71.88 % from 55 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty
Every day a male co-worker walks up very close to a lady at the coffee machine, inhales a big breath of air and tells her that her hair smells nice. After a week of this she can’t stand it anymore, takes her complaint to a Supervisor in the personnel department and asks to file a sexual harassment grievance against him. The Human Resources supervisor is puzzled, and asks: “What’s threatening about a co-worker telling you your hair smells nice?” The woman replies: “It’s Frank, the midget.”
Vote: has 78.68 % from 360 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty, sex, women, work
A blind man walks into a bar. And a table. And a chair.
Vote: has 60.76 % from 59 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty
While watching TV with his wife, a man tosses peanuts into the air and catches them in his mouth. Just as he throws another peanut into the air, the front door opens, causing him to turn his head. The peanut falls into his ear and gets stuck. His daughter comes in with her date. The man explains the situation, and the daughter's date says, "I can get the peanut out." He tells the father to sit down, shoves two fingers into the father's nose, and tells him to blow hard. The father blows, and the peanut flies out of his ear. After the daughter takes her date to the kitchen for something to eat, the mother turns to the father and says, "Isn't he smart? I wonder what he plans to be." The father says, "From the smell of his fingers, I'd say our son-in-law."
Vote: has 86.91 % from 474 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty
Q. What do a toilet and a woman have in common? A. Without the hole in the middle they aren't good for shit.
Vote: has 63.51 % from 38 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty, women
Guy: Can I buy you a drink? Girl: Sorry, but alcohol is bad for my legs. Guy: Do they swell? Girl: No. They spread.
Vote: has 86.38 % from 1169 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: alcohol, dirty
A black third grader goes to his mom and asks, '"Mom, I have the biggest dick in the third grade. Is that because I'm black?" And she responds, "No nigga, it's because you're nineteen!"
Vote: has 50.16 % from 61 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty
I like my women how I like my laptop. Sat on my lap, turned on & completely virus free.
Vote: has 76.01 % from 181 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: computer, dirty, women
What did the two tampons say to eachother? Nothing , because they were both stuck up bitches.
Vote: has 65.19 % from 87 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty
An apple, a banana and a penis got into an argument one day. The apple says sadly "I have the worst life ever. People take one bite of me and throw me on the ground." The banana says "You think thats bad? People take off my clothes, eat my insides and leave my clothes on the floor." The penis laughs. "You guys have it easy. You try having people sticking you in dark, wet caves, putting bags over your head, messaging you for hours and making you do push-ups until you throw up!"
Vote: has 79.32 % from 382 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty, food, sex