One day a mom and her son went to the zoo. There they saw two monkeys having sex. The son asked "What are they doing?". The mom said "Ohh they are making frosting", then they saw hippos doing it then he said "Mom what are they doing?" "Making frosting" she said. Later that night he saw there mom doing it. In the morning he said "Mom you and dad were making frosting so i ate it!"
Q: What's the difference between a tire and 365 used condoms? A: One's a Goodyear. The other's a great year.
Why did God give women belly buttons? For somewhere to stash your gum on the way down.
This couple were in bed getting busy when the girl places the guys hand onto her p*ssy. "Put your finger in me..." she asks him. So he does without hesitation, as she starts moaning. "Put two fingers in...", she says. So in goes another one. She's really starting to get worked up when she says,"Put your whole hand in!". The guy's like, "Ok!". So he has his entire hand in, when she says moaning aloud "Put both your hands inside of me!". So the guy puts both of his hands in! "Now clap your hands..." commands the girl. "I can't", says the guy. The girl looks at him and says "See, I told you I had a tight p*ssy!".
Q: Why is it jewish men won't go down on a woman? A: Too close to the gas chamber.
Q: What do you get when you mix chocolate and Viagra? A: Oooh - Henry!
Q: What did the prositutes knee say to the other? A: Nothing. They have never met.
Q: Why is Chelsea Clinton growing up a confused child? A: Because dad can’t keep his pants on and mom wants to wear them.
Q: Why did the man put condoms on his ears during sex? A: He didn't want to get hearing aids.
Q: What do you call a man who run a cross the road and roll in the dirt then run back across? A: A double dirty crosser.
You are so selfish! You're going to have that body the rest of your life and I just want it for one night.