If I had only one day left to live, I would live it in my math class: it would seem so much longer.
The teacher asked little Johnny, “What’s two and two?”. He counted 1-2-3-4 on his fingers and said, “Four, teacher?”. She said, ” Yes, that’s right, but you counted on your fingers. Put your hands behind behind your back and tell me what’s three and three”. He put his hands behind his back, fumbled around, and answered, “Six, teacher?”. She said, “Yes, that’s right, but you’re still counting on your fingers. Put your hands in your pockets and tell me what’s five and five”. He put his hands in his pockets, fumbled around, and replied, “Eleven, teacher?”.
Count from one to ten. That's how long it would take Chuck Norris to kill you... Forty seven times.
How the children from Chernobil count from one to hundred? On the fingers!
I used to think maths was useless, but then one day I realised that decimals had a point.
Chuck Norris knows the last number of infinity.
The teacher asks a student "If you have $5 and billy takes $3, how much do you have left?" The student replies "Not enough for fucking lunch and billy ain't gonna have no got damn teeth left stealing my 3 dollars."
Chuck Norris can cross all Seven Bridges of Konigsberg, making all the current laws of Math, obsolete.
Sex is like math: Add the bed Subtract the clothes Divide the legs and pray you dont multiply
Q: Why did the mathbook kill himself? A: Because nobody understood him.