Why did the scarecrow win an award?
Because he was outstanding in his field.
Similar jokes
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What did the blanket say to the bed?
Don't worry Ive got you covered!
What do women and pools have in common?
They both cost a lot of money to maintain for the little amount of time you're inside them.
They've broken in my house so many times, they leave notes complaining about things: "The salt was low."
"Pick up bread. We be back."
Grease all over my stove they cooked and left the best chicken and dressing you ever want to lay your lips on.
Going to war without the French is like going hunting without your accordion.
You WILL be a winner today.
Pick a fight with a four-year-old.
How do elves greet each other?
"Small world, isn't it?"
An old couple celebrates their 50th wedding anniversary in their home.
"Just think," the old man says, "we were sitting here at this same breakfast table, naked as jaybirds, 50 years ago."
"Well," the old lady snickers, "what do you say, should we get naked?"
The two immediately strip to the buff and sit back down at the table.
"You know, honey," the little old lady says slyly, "My breasts burn for you now as they did 50 years ago."
"I'm not surprised," replies the old man. "One's in your coffee and the other is in your oatmeal!"
Are you free on Sunday?
The director asks his secretary.
Yes, sir.
Then, please, use this day to rest a bit, so you won’t be late at work on Monday.
Kim and Kanye naming their baby North West is just like Brad Pitt naming his kid Arm.