Joke #615

When the President pushes the big red button, Chuck Norris's cell phone rings.
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has 84.90 % from 884 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, phone, political

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Chuck Norris doesn't dial the wrong number, you pick up the wrong phone
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A redneck calls up the White House and tells the receptionist: "I'd like to become the next President of the United States." The receptionist: "What are you, an idiot?" Redneck: "Why, is it required?"
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has 80.13 % from 92 votes. More jokes about: geography, phone, political, redneck, stupid
It was a celebratory mood with the boys at NASA; they had just made the scientific achievement of a lifetime. As they were uncorking a bottle of champagne, Dr. Lowenstein, the head scientist at NASA, asked everyone to be quiet as he had received a congratulatory phone call from the President of the United States. He picked up a special red phone, and spoke into it. "Mr. President," said Dr. Lowenstein, grinning broadly, "after twelve years of hard research and billions of dollars spent, we have finally found intelligent life on Mars." He listened for a second, and his smile gradually disappeared, replaced by a frown. He said, "But that’s impossible... we could never do it. Yes Mr. President,” and hung up the phone. He addressed the crowd of scientists staring at him curiously. "I have some bad news," he said, "the President said that now that we’ve found intelligent life on Mars... he wants us to try to find it in Congress."
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has 79.84 % from 60 votes. More jokes about: life, phone, political, science
If Chuck Norris were president, he would protect the secret service.
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has 77.54 % from 102 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, political
Chuck Norris' phone never auto corrects him.
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Police label anyone attacking Chuck Norris as a Code 45-11... a suicide.
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has 75.25 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, cop, death, phone
Chuck Norris can text using a rotary phone.
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has 73.56 % from 40 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, phone
Chuck Norris puts phone companies on hold.
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has 73.53 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, phone
Chuck Norris doesn't need a case for his phone. The ground is afraid to break it.
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has 73.53 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, phone
When Bell invented the telephone, there were already three Chuck Noris missed calls.
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has 73.11 % from 144 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, phone