Joke #615

When the President pushes the big red button, Chuck Norris's cell phone rings.
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has 83.67 % from 999 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, phone, political

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Chuck Norris doesn't dial the wrong number, you pick up the wrong phone
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A redneck calls up the White House and tells the receptionist: "I'd like to become the next President of the United States." The receptionist: "What are you, an idiot?" Redneck: "Why, is it required?"
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It was a celebratory mood with the boys at NASA; they had just made the scientific achievement of a lifetime. As they were uncorking a bottle of champagne, Dr. Lowenstein, the head scientist at NASA, asked everyone to be quiet as he had received a congratulatory phone call from the President of the United States. He picked up a special red phone, and spoke into it. "Mr. President," said Dr. Lowenstein, grinning broadly, "after twelve years of hard research and billions of dollars spent, we have finally found intelligent life on Mars." He listened for a second, and his smile gradually disappeared, replaced by a frown. He said, "But that’s impossible... we could never do it. Yes Mr. President,” and hung up the phone. He addressed the crowd of scientists staring at him curiously. "I have some bad news," he said, "the President said that now that we’ve found intelligent life on Mars... he wants us to try to find it in Congress."
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has 77.84 % from 82 votes. More jokes about: life, phone, political, science
If Chuck Norris were president, he would protect the secret service.
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has 70.72 % from 124 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, political
When Bell invented the telephone, there were already three Chuck Noris missed calls.
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Chuck Norris was asked if he would be running for President, after a chuckle, he stated, nothing makes him run.
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has 55.88 % from 57 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, political
Chuck Norris keeps a list of all his victims, it's called the phone book.
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has 55.51 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, phone
Police label anyone attacking Chuck Norris as a Code 45-11... a suicide.
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has 55.13 % from 61 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, cop, death, phone
Chuck Norris can hear his phone ring on silent.
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has 53.58 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, phone
Chuck Norris was about to die... until the Grim Reaper phoned in sick.
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has 53.22 % from 75 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death, phone