Chuck Norris keeps a list of all his victims, it's called the phone book.
When the President pushes the big red button, Chuck Norris's cell phone rings.
Chuck Norris doesn't dial the wrong number, you pick up the wrong phone
Chuck Norris can answer a missed call.
Chuck Norris' phone never auto corrects him.
Chuck Norris was about to die... until the Grim Reaper phoned in sick.
Police label anyone attacking Chuck Norris as a Code 45-11... a suicide.
Chuck Norris put his phone on air-plane mode and flew it.
Chuck Norris can text using a rotary phone.
When Bell invented the telephone, there were already three Chuck Noris missed calls.
Chuck Norris puts phone companies on hold.