Q:How do crazy people go through the forest?
A:They take the psycho path.
Similar jokes
See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.
‘I’ve found the secret of eternal youth.
I lie about my age.’
Bob Hope How many boring people does it take to change a light bulb?
One.
Chuck Norris was born in a house he build himself.
Vote:
A French guest, staying in a hotel called room service for some pepper.
"Black pepper, or white pepper?" asked the concierge.
"Toilette pepper!" came the reply
What did the egg say to the boiling water?
"How can you expect me to get hard so fast? I just got laid a minute ago."
1st Eskimo: "Where did your mother come from?"
2nd Eskimo: "Alaska."
1st Eskimo: "Don’t bother, I’ll ask her myself!"
Hello, and welcome to the mental health hotline.
If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly.
If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you.
If you have multiple personalities, press 3, 4, 5, and 6.
If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you want. Stay on the line so we can trace your call.
If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will be transferred to the mother ship.
If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a small voice will tell you which number to press.
If you are manic-depressive, it doesn’t matter which number you press, no one will answer.
If you are dyslexic, press 969696969696969.
If you have a nervous disorder, please fidget with the dash key until a representative comes on the line.
If you have amnesia, press 8 and state your name, address, phone number, date of birth, social security number, and your mother’s maiden name.
If you have post-traumatic stress disorder, slowly and carefully press 000.
If you have bipolar disorder, please leave a message after the beep or before the beep. Or after the beep. Please wait for the beep.
If you have low self-esteem, please hang up. All our operators are too busy to talk to you.
If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9…
On New Year's Eve, Marilyn stood up in the local pub and said that it was time to get ready.
At the stroke of midnight, she wanted every husband to be standing next to the one person who made his life worth living.
Well, it was kind of embarrassing.
As the clock struck, the bartender was almost crushed to death.
Why did Steve Jobs live his last moments in regret?
They say your life flashes before your eyes just before you die.
Unfortunately for Steve Jobs, his iPhone 4S didn't have a Flash player installed!
Cletus Cletus goes to work and sees that one of his co-workers has a thermos.
He asks him what it does and the fellow co-worker responds, "It keeps hot things hot, and cold things cold."
Cletus was amazed and when he got home immediately went out and bought one.
The next day he goes to work and is proud that he has this wonderful object.
The same co-worker realizes he has a thermos and says, "What do you have in it?"
He says, "Soup and ice cream!"
Chuck Norris is not cool.
By saying that, I have decreased my life to 5 seco...
Vote: