Chuck Norris had never escape from jail.
Jail escapes from Chuck Norris.
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In some countries, criminals have the option of either going to jail or spending a day living with Chuck Norris.
No one has ever chosen Chuck Norris
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Prisons don’t keep society safe from criminals.
Prisons keep criminals safe from Chuck Norris, for now.
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A nice, calm and respectable lady went into the pharmacy, right up to the pharmacist, looked straight into his eyes, and said, "I would like to buy some cyanide."
The pharmacist asked, "Why in the world do you need cyanide?"
The lady replied, "I need it to poison my husband."
The pharmacists eyes got big and he exclaimed, "Lord have mercy! I can't give you cyanide to kill your husband! That's against the law! I'll lose my license! They'll throw both of us in jail! All kinds of bad things will happen. Absolutely not! You CANNOT have any cyanide!"
The lady reached into her purse and pulled out a picture of her husband in bed with the pharmacist's wife.
The pharmacist looked at the picture and replied, "Well now. That's different. You didn't tell me you had a prescription."
Chuck Norris invented the Giraffe when he roundhouse kicked a spotted Horse in the chin.
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Chuck Norris doesn't mow his lawn, he dares his grass to grow.
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Cars were invented to have a faster way of fleeing from Chuck Norris.
Not to be outdone, Chuck Norris invented the car accident.
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Judge: "You are sentenced to 2 years of solitary confinement"
Me: "Thank you."
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Chuck Norris is the reason why Professor X is on a wheelchair.
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The main rule to obey, if you are in jail: never take a bow for a fallen soap from the wash basin. Try and you'll cry.