Chuck Norris is the only man to punch a cyclops between the eyes.
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Santa Claus asks Chuck Norris for presents.
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Kim Kardashian use to be 8 feet tall until Chuck Norris uppercut both her feet and that is why her ass is so big.
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Using only a black king, Chuck Norris defeated the world-champion grand-master in chess.
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The Titanic didn't sink by an ice burg, Chuck Norris was doing the back stroke across the Atlantic.
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R. Lee Ermey's war face is the face he made when he saw Chuck Norris ready to attack.
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Chuck Norris doesn't do Burn Down charts, he does Smack Down charts.
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Chuck Norris is a man of few words.
Chuck Norris is not a man of few roundhouse kicks to the face.
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Chuck Norris doesn't have a Facebook, he has a Fistbook...
No one's his friend.
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Chuck Norris is Darth Vaders father.
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Chuck Norris' yawn put people in comas.
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