Q: Did you hear about the new movie "Constipation?"
A: It hasn't come out yet.
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Similar jokes
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Birdie, birdie in the sky
Dropped some white stuff in my eye,
I'm a big girl I won't cry,
I'm just glad that cows don't fly.
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Dan staggers into the shower.
He notices that his d**k is bright orange.
He feels normal, but he's concerned and goes to the doctor.
After a thorough examination, the doctor says, "You seem to be fine and all of the tests are normal. Did you do anything out of the ordinary over the weekend?"
Dan says, "No. All I did was stay home, watch porno movies and eat Cheetos."
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Boy while kissing his girlfriend: "Thank u baby... For give me your chewing gum.."
Girl says, "This is not chewing gum my love. I’m suffering from cough!"
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What went through the fly's mind as he hit the windshield?
His Butt!
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A farmer and a son live on a farm.
The farmer is sitting in the kitchen when his son comes in from the barn with a large glass of white liquid.
He is so excited because he's just milked a cow.
Then he takes a big drink from the glass.
His father just stares at him.
"Son, we don't have a cow. We have a bull."
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That moment when you notice that one fork isn't really very clean when you're laying the table and you have to decide which family member you like the least.
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How do you embarrass an archaeologist?
Give him a used tampon and ask him what period it came from.
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What's gross?
Farting in the bathtub.
What's grosser than that?
Catching the bubbles with your teeth.
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Q: What is 40 feet long and smells like urine?
A: Line dancing at a nursing home.
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Q: What's the difference between a freezer and a fag?
A: A freezer doesn't fart when you pull the meat out.
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