Joke #6778

Q: Do you know the punishment for bigamy? A: Two mothers-in-law.
Vote:
has 83.48 % from 300 votes. More jokes about: marriage, mother in law

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

The newlywed wife said to her husband when he returned from work, “I have great news for you. Pretty soon, we’re going to be three in this house instead of two.” Her husband ran to her with a smile on his face and delight in his eyes. He was glowing of happiness and kissing his wife when she said, “I’m glad that you feel this way since tomorrow morning, my mother moves in with us.”
Vote:
has 80.28 % from 478 votes. More jokes about: husband, marriage, mother in law, wife, work
A man is driving with his wife at his side and his mother-in-law in the backseat. The women just won’t leave him alone. His mother-in-law says, "You’re driving too fast!" His wife says, "Stay more to the left." After ten mixed orders, the man turns to his wife and asks, "Who’s driving this car – you or your mother?"
Vote:
has 79.81 % from 413 votes. More jokes about: car, marriage, mother in law, wife
He named the street he built after his wife. It was very apt, as she was cold, hard, cracked and only got ploughed around Christmas.
Vote:
has 91.07 % from 3186 votes. More jokes about: marriage
So David Is finally engaged, and is excited to show off his new bride. "Ma", he said to his Mother, "I'm going to bring home three girls and I want you to guess which one is my fiance." Sure enough twenty minutes later, David walks in the door with three girls following behind him. "It's that one", said his mother, without blinking an eye. "Holy cow", exclaimed David, "how in the world did you know it was her?" "I just don't like her", she replied.
Vote:
has 82.79 % from 162 votes. More jokes about: family, mean, mother in law, wedding
Overheard in a restaurant: She: "This wine is described as full bodied and imposing with a nutty base, a sharp bite, and a bitter aftertaste." He: "Are you describing the wine or your mother?"
Vote:
has 61.71 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, mother in law, wine
I was at a magic show, when after one particularly amazing trick, someone screamed out, "wow, how did you do that." I would tell you", answered the magician predictably, "but then I'd have to kill you." After a moments pause the same voice screamed out "can you tell my mother in law?"
Vote:
has 82.89 % from 163 votes. More jokes about: death, mother in law
A guy goes into a tattoo parlor and asks for a tattoo of a $100 bill on his penis. Curious, the tattoo artist asks him why he would possibly want that. "Three reasons: I like to play with my money, I like to watch my money grow, and a hundred dollars seems to be the only thing my wife will blow these days."
Vote:
has 85.74 % from 642 votes. More jokes about: marriage
A man and a woman who have never met before find themselves in the same sleeping carriage of a train. After the initial embarrassment, they both manage to get to sleep, the woman on the top bunk, the man on the lower. In the middle of the night the woman leans over and says, "I'm sorry to bother you, but I'm awfully cold and I was wondering if you could possibly pass me another blanket." The man leans out and with a glint in his eye said "I've got a better idea, let's pretend we're married." "Why not," giggles the woman. "Good," he replies. "Get your own blanket."
Vote:
has 63.11 % from 395 votes. More jokes about: marriage
“Oh, I sure am glad to see you,” the little boy said to his grandmother (on his mother’s side). “Now Daddy will do the trick he’s been promising us.” The grandmother was curious. “What trick is that?” she asked. “He told Mommy that he’d climb the walls if you came to visit,” answered the boy.
Vote:
has 58.77 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: mother in law, old people
A husband said to his wife, "No, I don't hate your relatives. In fact, I like your mother-in-law better than I like mine."
Vote:
has 54.57 % from 75 votes. More jokes about: marriage