Why are contipated folks unkind and rude?
Cause they don't give a crap!
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A ship with 30 sailors and one woman strands on a desert island.
After one month the woman says:
"I can not proceed in this way."
And she suicides herself.
After another month, the sailors say:
"We can not proceed in this way."
And they bury the woman.
The next month, the sailors say:
"We can not proceed in this way."
And they dig up the woman.
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Joke has 18.59 % from 91 votes. More jokes about: black humor, death, desert island, disgusting, navy
Q: What's the ultimate rejection?
A: When you're masturbating and your hand falls asleep.
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What's red and lies in all four corners of the room?
A baby that's been playing with a chainsaw.
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What do you call a chocolate Easter bunny that was out in the sun too long?
A runny bunny.
I was having a shit in the train toilet today, when some bloke knocked on the door.
He said, "Can I see your ticket please?"
"Not right now" I shouted, "I'm having a shit!"
He said, "I don't believe you, can you pass it under the door?"
"No problem," I said, sliding it under. "The yellow bits are sweetcorn."
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A guy is late to meet with his friends at the local bar the friends obviously ask why he is late and he responds:
"Wow, you won't believe what just happened. So I take the usual route via the rail tracks and suddenly I see a young, naked woman tied up next to the tracks."
The friends are curious and ask: "Well, what happened next?"
The guy says: "Of course I untied her and we had sex because I freed her."
The friends are cheering and one friend asks: "Soo... did you get any head?"
The guy says: "No, I couldn't find it..."
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Q: Who is brave?
A: He who has diarrhea and wants to fart!
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How do you make stew out of a leper?
Put him in a Jacuzzi and turn it on full.
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Q: What would Princess Diana be doing if she were alive today?
A: Clawing at the lid of her coffin.
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Q: Did you hear about the redneck who was shooting craps?
A: He blew a hole in the toilet.
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