Chuck Norris is reading all these jokes and thinking to himself: They make me sound like a pussy.
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Usually when kids go to sleep they sleep with a teddy bear...
Chuck Norris sleeps with an actual bear
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Nice guys finish last because bad guys run faster from Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris was an only child.
Eventually.
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Steve Austin had to be rebuilt as the Six Million Dollar Man after he looked Chuck Norris in the eye, shook his hand and then went weak at the knees.
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Wheaties is the breakfast of champions, not for Chuck Norris.
He eats Chucky Charms, which contains diamonds, sulfuric acid, and radioactive uranium.
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Chuck Norris knows how to kill you in more ways than you know how to die.
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Chuck Norris is the only one who has a silver goldfish.
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The reason everything is better in Texas is because Chuck Norris said so.
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Chuck Norris once spent a month in El Paso one night.
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Bill Gates lives in fear Chuck Norris' PC will crash.
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