Beetlejuice is afraid to say Chuck Norris 3 times.
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If you see the Blue Screen of Death on your laptop... it's because Chuck Norris found out you were reading Chuck Norris jokes.
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In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Chuck Norris could use to kill you, including the room itself
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Chuck Norris douses all his food in diesel fuel and sets it on fire, 'cuz he likes it mildly spicy.
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Chuck Norris can facebook through a calculator.
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Chuck Norris doesn't need a GPS.
Chuck Norris decides where he is.
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The grass is always greener on the other side, unless Chuck Norris has been there.
In that case the grass is most likely soaked in blood and tears.
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Chuck Norris puts all of his baskets in one egg.
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Chuck Norris likes his coffee half and half: half coffee grounds, half wood-grain alcohol.
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The Animal Crackers that Chuck Norris eats are made from real animals.
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Chuck Norris knows what's eating Gilbert Grape.
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