Joke #7317

How is parsley like pubic hair? You push it aside to eat, and sometimes it gets stuck between your teeth after meals.
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has 52.18 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: disgusting

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Q: What did the butcher say when he backed into the meat-grinder? A: Looks like I'm getting a little behind in my work!
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has 46.20 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, work
Three flies in a trashcan get trapped overnight in a bathroom. The first fly goes to the sink, the second fly stays in the tub, and the third fly chooses the toilet. The next morning, all the exhausted flies gather back in the garbage can. The first fly says, "I'm exhausted! I almost got washed down the drain." The second fly says, "I almost got squashed by feet in the shower!" The third fly says, "The toilet was fine until it suddenly got dark. First, I heard thunder, then it started to rain, and if it weren't for that big brown log, I surely would have drowned."
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has 66.45 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: disgusting
Three guys compare their levels of intoxication from a party the previous night. The first guy says, "Man, I was so drunk last night, I went home and blew chunks." The second guy says, "I was so drunk last night, I woke up this morning on my front porch." The third guy says, "I was so drunk last night, I took a prostitute home to my wife." The first guy exclaims, "You guys don't understand! Chunks is my dog!"
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has 75.83 % from 330 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, dog, drunk, party, wife
One day, a guy walks out from a shop to see someone PISSING on his Ferrari. "Hey," says the man. "Why are you pissing on my Ferrari?" "Because I feel like it." "Tell you what -- I won't report you to the police if you can keep up with my Ferrari." "Whatever." So the guy gets in his car and drives off, going faster and faster, until he's hit 100 miles per hour. Amazingly, the guy is still keeping up. "I'm amazed," says the driver. "How are you keeping up?" "It's easy," says the running man, "when your d**k is stuck in the door."
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has 45.58 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: car, cop, disgusting
Q: What do you call a Puerto Rican midget? A: A spec.
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has 30.36 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: disgusting
A ship with 30 sailors and one woman strands on a desert island. After one month the woman says: "I can not proceed in this way." And she suicides herself. After another month, the sailors say: "We can not proceed in this way." And they bury the woman. The next month, the sailors say: "We can not proceed in this way." And they dig up the woman.
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has 20.72 % from 111 votes. More jokes about: death, desert island, disgusting, sex, women
Q: What's meaner than a pit bull with herpes? A: The guy who gave it to him.
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has 52.93 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: animal, disgusting, health
An old man and his wife went to the doctor's office. The doctor asked the man for a blood, urine and feces sample. The man was slightly deaf and said, "What?" The doctor said, "I need a blood, urine and feces sample." The man still looked puzzled, so his wife leaned over and yelled into his ear, "Sheldon, the doctor needs a pair of your underwear."
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has 72.56 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, doctor, wife
This desperate guy named Jim goes to the whorehouse with 5$. He buys a the cheapest prostitute named Sandpaper Sally. As they start to have sex, Jim screams, "Ouch! Now I know why they call you Sandpaper Sally!" Sally scoots out of the room. Five minutes later she came back and Jim attempts sex once again. "What the hell happened?" asks Jim, "This is the best sex I''ve ever had!" Sally replies, "Oh, I just picked my scabs."
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has 48.37 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, money, sex
What is the last thing to go through a bug's mind when it hits your windshield? It's ass.
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has 54.66 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: animal, disgusting