What is the sharpest thing in the world?
A Fart.
It goes through your pants and doesn't even leave a hole.
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Similar jokes
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Why should you only put 239 beans in bean soup?
Cuz one more will make it "too farty!"
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What's the difference between a leprechaun and gonorrhea?
One's a cunning runt.
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What is grosser than gross?
When you're kissing Grandma and she slips you the tongue.
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Little Red Riding Hood walks through the forest and sees a wolf hunched under a tree with its ears erect and its mouth stretched in a big grimace.
She says to the wolf, "My, what big ears you have!"
The wolf keeps grimacing.
She says, "My, what big eyes you have!"
The wolf grimaces even wider, baring his teeth.
She says, "My, what big teeth you have!"
The wolf finally snaps and says, "F**k off! I'm trying to take a dump."
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What do you call a masturbating cow?
Beef Stroke-n-off
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How is a soyburger like a dildo?
They're both substitutes for meat.
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While grocery shopping, a single man comes across toilet brushes.
"Wow! What a great idea," he thinks to himself and buys three of them.
Two weeks later, however, he goes back to using toilet paper.
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How did the live baby escape from a room filled with with zombie babies?
He ate his way out.
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A little old lady sits at the luncheonette counter and orders a hamburger.
The huge guy behind the counter bellows, "One burger!"
Whereupon the chef grabs a huge hunk of chopped meat, stuffs it in his bare armpit, pumps his arm a few times to squeeze it flat, and then tosses it on the grill.
"That's the most disgusting thing I've ever seen," the old lady says.
"Yeah?" says the counterman. "You should be here in the morning when he makes the doughnuts."
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Ozzy Osbourne bites the heads off of bats.
Chuck Norris bites the heads off of Siberian Tigers.
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