Chuck norris can fix a plumbers crack.
Chuck Norris can give you a wet willie with a dry finger.
Chuck Norris died 20 years ago, Death just hasn't built up the courage to tell him yet.
The song Santa Claus is Coming To Town was originaly called Chuck Norris is Coming To Town. They changed it so the children wouldn't live in fear.
Avatar's were invented when Chuck Norris laid an uppercut to a smurf.
When Chuck Norris gets nominated for the ALS ice bucket challenge, the bucket donates $1000 to ALS research.
Everytime a star explodes, it's because one of Chuck Norris's victims just landed there after being round-house kicked.
Chuck Norris wears white to a funeral, no one asks why.
Chuck Norris broke the world record for most punches in a minute with one roundhouse kick.
Chuck Norris has never won an Academy Award for acting... because he's not acting.
Chuck Norris can scratch sandpaper.