Joke #8166

The tax advisor had just read the story of Cinderella to his four-year-old daughter for the first time. The little girl was fascinated by the story, especially the part where the pumpkin turns into a golden coach. Suddenly she piped up, "Daddy, when the pumpkin turned into a golden coach, would that be classed as income or a long-term capital gain?"

Accountant after reading a nursery rhyme to his child,"No, son. It wouldn't be tax deductible when Little Bo Peep loses her sheep. But I like your thinking."

Mary's father has 5 daughters, 1. Nana 2. Nono 3. Nini 4. Nene What is the fifth daughters name?

One day, little Suzie was strolling around the house and just happened to pass by her sister’s room. She heard her sister say on the phone to her boy friend. “Your such an as***!” and she hung up. Suzie asked what as*** had meant and her sister sayin “Uh… it means… uhh.. boyfriend!”. Suzie is delighted to hear a new nice word. Then,She was walking past the bathroom where her dad was shaving. Her dad had cut himself and yelled “SHIT!” Then turniing around saw little Suzie ask what shit means. Dad, being quite shocked answered “It uhh.. It.. It means shaving cream.” Then, Suzie walked downstairs to help her mom with the dinner turkey. Suzie’s dad’s boss was coming to dinner tonight. When Suzie went in the kitchen, her mom accidently cut herself yelled”F***k!”. Suzie asked what f***k meant and mom replied ” it..it..it uummm…it means cut… yeah, cut.” Just as mom said that, the doorbell rang and asked Suzie to go and get it. When Suzie opened the door, her dad’s boss was standing there. Boss asked” Well hello young lady! Can I ask where your family is? ”Then Suzie said” Well, my sister’s upstairs talking to her as*** on the phone, my dad’s in the bathroom wiping the shit off his face and my mom’s in the kitchen f***g the turkey!”

Q: What is Father Christmas's tax status? A: Elf-employed.

Q: Why do Republican tax cuts always expire in ten years or less? A: They want to make them thirty but keep running out of fingers.

Most babies born today are very young.

A little boy got lost at the YMCA and found himself in the women's locker room. When he was spotted, the room burst into shrieks, with ladies grabbing towels and running for cover. The little boy watched in amazement and then asked, "What's the matter, haven't you ever seen a little boy before?"

How do you know you have a great CPA? He has a tax loophole named after him.

Q: What's the difference between death and taxes? A: Congress doesn't meet every year to make death worse.

Q: What is the definition of an extroverted tax accountant? A: Someone who stares at YOUR shoes when talking to you.