The housing market crashed because Chuck thought he was paying too much property tax.
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The only sure things are Death and Taxes…and when Chuck Norris goes to work for the IRS, they'll be the same thing.
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The supreme court issued a ban not allowing Chuck Norris to flex his muscles, for fear of public safety.
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Chuck Norris donates his beard clippings to the Army so they can make Kevlar vests.
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A blonde walks into a drugstore and purchases a pack of condoms.
"That will be $1.08, please," says the clerk.
"What are the eight cents for?" asks the blonde.
"It says one dollar right here on the packaging."
"Tax," replies the clerk.
"Gee," says the blonde, "I thought you just rolled them on and they stayed put."
Chuck Norris CAN get blood from a stone.
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Q: What's the difference between death and taxes?
A: Congress doesn't meet every year to make death worse.
Chuck Norris solved Unsolved Mysteries.
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Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer.
Too bad he has never cried.
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Q: How do you know you've got a good tax accountant?
A: He's had a loophole named after him.
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Chuck Norris has 12 moons.
One of those moons is the Earth.
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