Q: Why is diarrhea hereditary? A: It runs in your genes.
What is grosser than gross? When you're kissing Grandma and she slips you the tongue.
Another name for a vagina is a cockpit
What's the definition of bravery? A man with diarrhea chancing a fart!
Q: What is 40 feet long and smells like urine? A: Line dancing at a nursing home.
Q: How does a redneck tell the difference between a bull and a cow in the dark? A: He sticks his nose in the animal's ass. If there's a place for his tongue, it's a cow.
1 woman and 9 men shipwreck on a deserted island. After one week, the woman, disgusted by the things she was doing, kills herself. After another week, the men, disgusted by the things they were doing, buried her. After another week, the men, more disgusted by the things they were doing, dug her up.
How do you know you're at a bulimic bachelor party? When the cake jumps out of the girl!
Q: What can popsicles do that men can't? A: Come in five flavors.
What kind of a car does a proctologist drive? A brown Probe!
A guy in a supermarket goes up to the cashier and places two cans of dog food on the counter. The cashier asks, "Do you have a dog sir?" "Yes, it's at home," replies the man. "To be able to sell you the dog food sir, I must see the dog. That is store policy," says the cashier. Next day the man goes places two cans of cat food on the counter. "Do you own a cat sir?" asks the cashier. "Yes I do, it's at home," says the man. "Well I am sorry sir. Store policy. I must see the cat before I can sell you cat food," says the cashier. The next day the man returns to the store and walks directly to the same cashier. He has a brown paper bag in his hand. "Here," he says to the cashier, "put your hand in here." The cashier puts her hand in the brown paper bag. "It is all soft and warm," she says. "Yes, that's right," says the man, "I need to buy two rolls of toilet paper."