Q: What’s an orgasm, Mom?
A: I don’t know… ask your father.
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Who's the biggest prostitute in history?
Ms. Pacman, for 25 cents that b*tch swallowed balls till she died.
Patient: "Doc, recently I've been very careless."
Doc: "How? Give me an example."
Patient: "Now I'm speaking with you, it seems that I'm talking to my dick."
Vote:
Sandy and John were an extremely liberal, though not especially bright, white couple.
Wanting to begin a family, they decided they wanted to have a black baby, and set to work.
Nine months later, the fruits of their labor was born: a lovely white girl.
Pleased but disappointed, John decided to ask a black man at work why they hadn't parented a black baby.
Realizing that John was somewhat sluggish, the fellow took him aside and asked, "Is your d*ck at least a foot long?"
John had to admit that it was not.
"And is it at least four inches wide?"
Once more John replied in the negative.
"Well, man, there's your problem!" the guy slapped him on the back.
"You let in too much light!"
Q: Why would a blonde wear green lipstick?
A: Because red means Stop.
Q: What's the difference between 3 d*cks and a joke?
A: Your mom can't take a joke.
Do you work at a cattery?
Because I wanna be covered in pussy.
Roses are red,
violets are blue.
Pornhub is Down,
your mums Facebook will do.
Two boys go into a forest and walk around.
Suddenly they see a naked women, then one of the boys run away.
The other chases after him. The boy asked "Why did u run away?"
The other said "My mom told me if i saw a naked women i'd turn to stone, i already felt something getting getting hard."
As I stand here, and try to piss,
I think of the gal that gave me this.
If I see her, when I get well,
I'll get it again.
As sure as Hell.
"Honey," said this husband to his wife, "I invited a friend home for supper."
"What? Are you crazy?
The house is a mess, I haven't been shopping, all the dishes are dirty, and I don't feel like cooking a fancy meal!"
"I know all that."
"Then why did you invite a friend for supper?"
"Because the poor fool's thinking about getting married."