Chuck Norris once stayed at the Hotel California and was allowed to check out... and leave.
When I was a kid, my Chuck Norris action figure broke all my other toys while I was at school. When my mom tried to throw him away, he killed her.
The speed of light was instituted because Chuck Norris didn't want get winded outrunning it. Chuck Norris hates to sweat.
Chuck Norris can paste something before he copies it.
Chuck Norris doesn't give warnings. He doesn't have to, you should already know.
Sharks have a week dedicated to Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris can talk with his mouth closed.
Chuck Norris can mess with the bull without getting the horns.
Chuck Norris has a six-pack on his chin.
Chuck Norris can watch DVD's on a VCR.
Lawsuit commercials for personal injury are quite common with things like accidents and medication; however they never mention Chuck Norris.