Chuck Norris once stayed at the Hotel California and was allowed to check out... and leave.
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With the rising cost of gasoline, Chuck Norris is beginning to worry about his drinking habit.
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Chuck Norris rejects your reality and substitutes it with his fist.
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Chuck Norris fires Donald Trump.
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Chuck Norris can smell sound and hear touch.
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Chuck Norris gives poison ivy a rash.
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Chuck Norris thought 24 was a sit-com.
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Chuck Norris doesn't have a Facebook, he has a Fistbook...
No one's his friend.
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Chuck Norris just completed a full round of Golf... In 17 shots.
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Person 1: Global Warming doesn't exist. Chuck Norris was cold so he turned the sun up.
Person 2: That's bullhsh*t! everyone knows Chuck Norris doesn't get cold!
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Chuck Norris' Facebook status has a dislike button...nobody clicks it.
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