Chuck Norris once stayed at the Hotel California and was allowed to check out... and leave.
If you poke Chuck Norris on facebook he will kick you. On facebook!
If you look back far enough in your family tree, Chuck Norris appears at least three times.
Chuck Norris once scored a field goal, using a hockey stick!
Chuck Norris has the greatest Poker-Face of all time. He won the 1983 World Series of Poker, despite holding only a Joker, a Get out of Jail Free Monopoloy card, a 2 of clubs, 7 of spades and a green #4 card from the game UNO.
When Chuck Norris says 'Candyman' five times in a row, no one appears. Candyman ain't stupid.
If Chuck Norris were a calendar, every month would be named Chucktober, and every day he'd kick your ass.
Before America can declare war, congress has to ask Chuck Norris.
When Chuck Norris wants to burn calories, he throws fat kids into a camp fire.
On his birthday, Chuck Norris randomly selects one lucky child to be thrown into the sun.