Joke #8591

Men call us birds, is that because of all the worms we pick up?
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has 58.75 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: bird, men

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Eleven people were hanging on a rope under a helicopter, ten men and one woman. The rope was not strong enough to carry them all, so they decided that one has to drop off, otherwise they are all going to fall. They were not able to choose that person, but then the woman made a very touching speech. She said that she would voluntarily let go of the rope, because as woman she was used to giving up everything for her husband and kids, and for men in general, without ever getting anything in return. As soon as she finished her speech, all the men started clapping their hands.
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has 53.62 % from 34 votes. More jokes about: men
A man is in a mall and sees a clothes store. He sees a magnificent, brand new jacket in the shop window and decides he shall try it on and buy it. So he walks into the shop and asks an employee: "Excuse me sir." "How can I help you" the employee replies. "Could I by any chance try on that jacket in your shop window?" The employee looks at him and says "No you shall not you are to try it on in the changing rooms like everybody else!"
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has 61.89 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: beauty, communication, customer service, men
A true gentleman holds the door for his woman... then smacks her ass as she walks by.
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has 58.52 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: men
Q: Why are Christmas trees better than Men? A: Even the small ones give satisfaction.
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has 47.97 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: Christmas, dirty, men, sex
A man has 6 items in his bathroom: a toothbrush, toothpaste, shaving cream, razor, a bar of Dial soap and a towel from the Holiday Inn. The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 437. A man would not be able to identify most of these items.
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has 30.43 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: men, women
Women dream of world peace, a safe environment, and eliminating hunger. What do men dream of? Being stuck in an elevator with the Doublemint twins.
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has 45.58 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: men, women
Chicken to turkey: "Only Thanksgiving and Christmas? You're lucky, with us it's any Sunday."
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has 56.92 % from 37 votes. More jokes about: bird, Christmas, death, food, Thanksgiving
Q: What do you get if you cross a nun and a chicken? A: A pecking order.
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has 69.86 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: bird, life, religious
Q: What do you get when you cross a penis and a potato? A: A dic-tater.
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has 61.28 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: food, men
HOW TO IMPRESS A WOMAN Compliment her, cuddle her, kiss her, caress her, love her, stroke her, comfort her, protect her, hug her, wine and dine her, buy gifts for her, listen to her, respect her, stand by her, support her, go to the ends of the earth for her. HOW TO IMPRESS A MAN Arrive naked... with beer.
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has 84.77 % from 1149 votes. More jokes about: beer, love, men, romantic, women