How is being at a singles bar different from going to the circus?
At the circus the clowns don't talk.
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Adam goes to God and says, "I would like a mate to please me and make living joyful. She should be beautiful and perfect in every way.
God says, "I can do that, but it will cost you a testicle, a kidney, and one eye."
To which Adam replied, "Well, what can I get for a rib?"
After an accident...
1st Driver : I flashed the headlights and told you to let me go first.
2nd Driver : I also started the wipers and said NO NO...
Q: What do you call a man who run a cross the road and roll in the dirt then run back across?
A: A double dirty crosser.
What are two reasons why men don't mind their own business?
1) No mind.
2) No business.
Why is sleeping with a man like a soap opera?
Just when it's getting interesting, they're finished until next time.
God gave man his penis and his brain but blood only enough to work one another at a time.
What do you call an intelligent, good looking, sensitive man?
A rumor.
A new bride was a bit embarrassed to be known as a honeymooner.
So when she and her husband pulled up to the hotel, she asked him if there was any way that they could make it appear that they had been married a long time.
He responded, "Sure.
You carry the suitcases!"
"I can't wait for Father's Day" said no man ever.
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