Joke #8866

New York was having a problem with too many pigeons in the city. The mayor of New York placed an ad asking for help to get rid of the pigeons in the city. A man responded to the ad. The man said that he would get rid of all of the pigeons in New York for $1million. He stated that he would stand behind his work and that he had very good credentials. There was only one stipulation, any questions that were asked would cost the city an additional $1million if answered. The mayor agreed to the terms. The man went to his car and brought back a small box. He opened the box and pulled out a pink pigeon. He released the pigeon into the air. Soon all of the pigeons in the city were following this pigeon. The pink pigeon lead all of the city's pigeons over the ocean and one by one the pigeons began to tire and fell into the ocean and died. The pink pigeon returned to it's owner and was given a soft pat on the back and put back into the box. The mayor was totally amazed by this. The mayor complimented the man on his magnificent work. The mayor told the man that he had a question for him. The man reminded the mayor that any questions to be answered would cost an additional $1million. The mayor said that his question was worth the cost. The mayor asked the man if he happened to have any pink niggers.

Why are there no mexicans on star trek? They don't work in the future either.

I'll admit that the Chinese kids in math class are pretty smart. But doing it with their eyes closed... that's a bit cocky.

The German air controllers at Frankfurt Airport are renowned as a short-tempered lot. They not only expect one to know one’s gate parking location, but how to get there without any assistance from them. So it was with some amusement that we (a Pan Am 747) listened to the following exchange between Frankfurt ground control and a British Airways 747, call sign "Speedbird 206″: Speedbird 206: "Frankfurt, Speedbird 206 clear of active runway." Ground: "Speedbird 206. Taxi to gate Alpha One-Seven." The BA 747 pulled onto the main taxiway and slowed to a stop. Ground: "Speedbird, do you not know where you are going?" Speedbird 206: "Stand by, Ground, I’m looking up our gate location now." Ground (with quite arrogant impatience): "Speedbird 206, have you not been to Frankfurt before?" Speedbird 206 (coolly): "Yes, twice in 1944 but I didn’t stop."

In Heaven: The cooks are French, The policemen are English, The mechanics are German, The lovers are Greek, The bankers are Swiss. In Hell: The cooks are English, The policemen are German, The mechanics are French, The lovers are Swiss, The bankers are Greek.

What do you call Black people running down a hill? Jail break.

A first grade teacher explains to her class that she is an American. She asks her students to raise their hands if they were American too. Not really knowing why but wanting to be like their teacher, their hands explode into the air like flashy fireworks. There is, however, one exception. A girl named Kristen has not gone along with the crowd. The teacher asks her why she has decided to be different. "Because I am not an American." "Then", asks the teacher, "What are you?" "I'm a proud Canadian," boasts the little girl. The teacher is a little perturbed now, her face slightly red. She asks Kristen why she is a Canadian. "Well, my mom and dad are Canadians, so I'm a Canadian too." The teacher is now angry. "That's no reason," she says loudly. "What if your mom was a moron, and your dad was a moron. What would you be then?" A pause, and a smile. "Then," says Kristen, "I'd be an American."

How do they name Chinese baby's? They throw silverware down the stairs until they hear something they like.

Q: Why do Mexicans have such small steering wheels in their car? A: So they can drive with handcuffs on.

Q: How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? A: Just Juan.

A white guy goes into a bar and sees a black bartender. He says, "yo, nigger, get me a beer!" The bartender says, "that's very rude. How would you like it if I talked to you like that?" The white guy says, "let's switch places and see!" So they switch places. The bartender says, " yo, cracka, get me a beer!" The white guy says, "sorry, we don't serve niggers here!"