Joke #8871

TEACHER: Why would you paint something black? STUDENT: So it runs faster.
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has 14.36 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: kids

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How do Chinese people name their kids? Throw a spoon down the stairs. CHING CHANG CHONG TING.
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has 51.12 % from 94 votes. More jokes about: kids, racist
Kid: "please could I go 2 the toilet" teacher: "say the alphabet" Kid: "abcdefghijklmnoqrstuvwxyz" teacher: "where's the p?" kid: "running half way down my leg"
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has 61.01 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: kids
Two tomatoes are trying to pass the street. Suddenly, the one screams to the other: "CAR!" (splash) "WHERE?" (splash)
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After watching the grades of his child, the angry father said, "After seeing your grades, I feel like teaching a lesson or two and want to give a tight slap." The child excitedly says, "Yes dad, lets go, I know the addresses of all my teachers, we must teach them a lesson."
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has 60.15 % from 58 votes. More jokes about: dad, kids
A priest was talking to a group of kids about "being good" and going to heaven. At the end of his talk, he asked, "Where do you want to go?" "Heaven! Heaven!" Yelled Little Lisa. "And what do you have to be to get there?" asked the priest. "Dead!" Yelled Little Johnny.
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has 84.30 % from 1316 votes. More jokes about: death, heaven, kids, little Johnny, priest
Q: What did the little black kid get for Christmas? A: My bike.
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has 60.76 % from 384 votes. More jokes about: black people, Christmas, kids, mean
Facebook: "My kids are perfect." Instagram: "My kids are beautiful." Twitter: "My kids are why I drink."
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has 66.21 % from 45 votes. More jokes about: internet, kids
Three women are discussing their teenage daughters. The first declares: “I was so shocked last week. I was tidying my daughter”s room and I found a packet of cigarettes under her pillow. I didn’t even know that she smoked!” “It gets worse than that,” says the second mother. “I was tidying my daughter”s room last week and I found a bottle of vodka under her bed. I didn’t even know that she drank!” “Oh, it gets even worse than that,” says the third mother. “I was tidying my daughter”s room last week and you”ll never guess what I found in her bedside cabinet: a packet of condoms! I didn’t even know that she had a penis!”
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has 82.64 % from 207 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, kids, teen, women
Two guys meet: "Where were you lost my friend? says one of them." "Well, I took my kids to the zoo..." "And what kind of animals did you see there?" "The tiger... Huge and Scary! Full of stripes... Slowly walking inside the cage. She was “ahgrrr...” "Are you kidding me men? The tiger doesn’t go “ahgrrr..” … She “grrrrsss..”! "Right, ok.. But when you get too close to her face... !"
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has 11.12 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: animal, kids
Why would I buy a pumpkin at the store for $5 when I can drive 30 miles & pay to make my kids walk through a field to pick our own for $27.
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has 63.66 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: driving, kids, money