When Chuck Norris was a kid he didn't play with Lincoln Logs, he built real houses.
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Chuck Norris was once on Celebrity Wheel of Fortune and was the first to spin.
The next 29 minutes of the show consisted of everyone standing around awkwardly, waiting for the wheel to stop.
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Chuck Norris can win a game of Connect Four in only three moves.
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The saddest moment for a child is not when he learns Santa Claus isn't real.
It's when he learns Chuck Norris is.
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Four-year-old to her two-year-old sister: "Let's play Christmas. I'll be Santa Claus and you can be a present and I'll give you away."
When Chuck Norris played the card game War with a friend, France surrendered.
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Chuck Norris didn't survive the first night in Minecraft, the first night survived Chuck Norris.
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Q: You know what lego set Trump played with as a kid?
A: The wall maker set.
Chuck Norris once had a bet with the Hulk, the loser had to paint himself green.
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Chuck Norris can finish Mario Bros without using the jump button.
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Chuck Norris could play cd-based games on his Nintendo 64.
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