Q: Why is Chelsea Clinton growing up a confused child? A: Because dad can’t keep his pants on and mom wants to wear them.
Q: What do you call that useless piece of skin around a vagina? A: A woman.
Undertaker to bereaved husband. When did you 1st notice your wife was dead? Well he replies, "The s*x was the same but the dishes were starting too pile up."
"Dad, whats the difference between a p*ssy and a c*nt ?" young son ask. "Look at this," says dad, as he lifts the sheets on his naked sleeping mother, "that's a p*ssy son." "Its wonderful dad, can I touch it?" "NO son," says dad, "If you touch the p*ssy you'll wake the c*nt up!"
Q: What did the prositutes knee say to the other? A: Nothing. They have never met.
An old man goes to the Wizard to ask him if he can remove a curse he has been living with for the last 40 years. The Wizard says, "Maybe, but you will have to tell me the exact words that were used to put the curse on you. The old man says without hesitation, "I now pronounce you man and wife."
Q: How do you know a blonde just lost her virginity? A: The crayons are still sticky.
What do your parents' car and testicles have in common? Hit either one of them and you're grounded.
Lesbians can also take Viagra. They don't have to swallow it, they just let it melt in their tongues.
Q: Why did they make glow in the dark condoms? A: So gay guys can play star wars.