Joke #9219

Churchill: Madam, would you sleep with me for £1 million? Woman: Why Winston, yes I would. Churchill: What about £10? Woman: What sort of woman do you think I am? Churchill: We have already established what sort of woman you are, now we are just negotiating the price.
Vote:
has 84.66 % from 190 votes. More jokes about: women

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

Did you ever notice: Everything on a woman's upper body starts with a "B". Blouse, Bra, Bikini, Boobs and lower body with a "P" Peticoat, panties, pussy... That's origin of "BP"!
Vote:
has 65.16 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: communication, women
Q: Why did this woman cross the road? A: Because I was not fast enough to hit her.
Vote:
has 53.04 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: women
Q: How do you know if a girl is pregnant? A: Shove a tampon and see if all of the cotton is picked.
Vote:
has 45.10 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: baby, black humor, women
An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman were sitting in a bar, drinking, and discussing how stupid their wives were. The Englishman says, "I tell you, my wife is so stupid. Last week she went to the supermarket and bought $300 worth of meat because it was on sale, and we don’t even have a fridge to keep it in." The Scotsman agrees that she sounds pretty stupid, but says his wife is more stupid. "Just last week, she went out and spent $17,000 on a new car," he laments, "and she doesn’t even know how to drive!" The Irishman nods sagely, and agrees that these two woman sound like they both walked through the stupid forest and got hit by every branch. However, he still thinks his wife is dumber. "Ah, it kills me every time I think of it," he chuckles, "my wife left to go on a trip to Greece. I watched her packing her bag, and she must have put about 100 condoms in there and she doesn’t even have a dick!"
Vote:
has 72.58 % from 74 votes. More jokes about: bar, money, stupid, wife, women
A foursome is waiting at the men's tee when another foursome of ladies are hitting from the ladies tee. The ladies are taking their time and when finally the last one is ready to hit the ball she hacks it about 10 feet, goes over to it, hacks it another ten feet and looks up at the men waiting and says apologetically "I guess all those fucking lessons I took this winter didn't help." One of the men immediately replies, "No, you see that's your problem. You should have been taking golf lessons instead."
Vote:
has 64.21 % from 62 votes. More jokes about: golf, men, sport, winter, women
Companies are working on a camera which has such a fast shutter speed that it can take a picture of a woman with her mouth shut. Advance Booking open!
Vote:
has 52.49 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: women, work
A woman went to a doctor and said , doctor, I have a problem. Every time I sneeze I have an orgasm. The doctor said, oh really, what have you been doing for it. The woman replied, snorting pepper.
Vote:
has 41.82 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: doctor, women
“Honey,” said this husband to his wife, “I invited a friend home for supper.” “What? Are you crazy? The house is a mess, I haven’t been shopping, all the dishes are dirty, and I don’t feel like cooking a fancy meal!” “I know all that.” “Then why did you invite a friend for supper?” “Because the poor fool’s thinking about getting married.”
Vote:
has 41.91 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: women
*Girl is crying* Dad: Why you crying? Girl: My boyfriend dumped me! Dad: (Grabs shot gun) I'll be back.. A while later dad comes back Girl: What the hell! why did you go kill him! Dad: I didn't Girl: Where did you go? Dad: To get you icecream :D Girl: Why the hell did you bring the shot gun?! Dad: So I could get it for free!
Vote:
has 61.44 % from 107 votes. More jokes about: dad, food, women
Q: If a man crashes his car into a woman who's fault is it? A: Well what was the man doing driving in the kitchen...
Vote:
has 46.88 % from 94 votes. More jokes about: car, driving, women