What is height of Activelaziness?
Asking for a lift to house while on a morning walk.
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Chuck Norris has only used the 'Total Gym' twice in his life.
When his eyes are open - and when they are closed.
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Q: How do Columbians develop muscle?
A: By pushing drugs.
Q: Why wasn't the bodybuilder evicted?
A: Because he was squatting.
A student was lucky to find a decent accommodation with a cheap rent. His colleagues came to visit him and he was showing them the house.
"This is the kitchen. This is the bedroom. And this one is the living room ... "
"And what are this hammer and this pot that are hanging on the wall for? What are you going to do with them?" one of his colleagues asked.
"This is a talking clock."
"I have never seen a clock like that. Can you show me how it works?"
"Sure. Look," the student said.
He took the hammer and struck at the pot with all his strength. Then a voice was heard from the other side,
"What you are doing? Are you crazy? It is half past one in the night, you idiot!"
Doctor: "Yes, what is it I can do for you?"
Blond: "Doctor, yesterday, when I was doing my yoga, one of my friends told me that if I did this particular exercise, all my body’s blood would go into my head. But, when I stand, why doesn’t anyone say that all the blood would go into the legs?"
Doctor: "The fact’s your legs are not that hollow as your head is."
When Chuck Norris first saw Dragon Ball Z he thought it was a series of easy workout videos.
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My yoga instructor says I need to work on my breathing.
But I mean, 41 years, still alive.
I kinda got it.
Q: Why did Arnold Schwarzenegger train on a desert island?
A: He wanted maximum isolation.
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What do you call it when Miley Cyrus falls down?
Hoe-Down.