Sometimes, during the movie previews, I'll turn to the stranger sitting next to me and whisper, "We should really go see that together."
In the town I have met one older woman, she told me: "if you give me ten euros, I will pray for your black soul." I gave her the ten euros, became suspicious, didn't believe her and told her: "ok, but pray for me right now, not in the evening." The woman has begun: "guardian angel, please, take care of my soul, forgive me all my sins and give me everything I need in my life." I have asked her only: "for my money?"
How do you describe an angry potato? Boiling Mad.
Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life.
How do elves greet each other? "Small world, isn't it?"
The doctor said he would have me on my feet in two weeks." "And did he?" "Yes, I had to sell the car to pay the bill."
This couple board this jetliner for a trip to New York. The jetliner gets full of passengers and they are to go but, they notice that there are no attendants or pilots. The door closes and the jetliner starts taxing down the taxiway towards the runway and starts to take off as they are airborne the intercom says: Welcome to flight 1313 non stop to New York as you can see there are no attendants and or pilots this aircraft is totally computerized so sit back and enjoy the flight because there is nothing that can go wrong go wrong go wrong go wrong ...
Mary's father has 5 daughters, 1. Nana 2. Nono 3. Nini 4. Nene What is the fifth daughters name?
Women prefer the simple things in life… like men.
A sandwich walks into a bar. The barman says ''Sorry we don't serve food in here''
There's an order to the universe: space, time, Chuck Norris... Just kidding, Chuck Norris is first.