Joke #9542

An evening of Valentine's Day. A man comes to a drug store: "Good evening!" "Sorry, we are sold out..."
Vote:
has 47.48 % from 49 votes. More jokes about: drug, sex, Valentines day

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

Two old ladies were outside smoking one day when it started to rain. One of the ladies took out a condom, cut off the tip, and put it over her cigarette. The other lady said, 'Hey, that's a good idea. What's that called?' The lady responded, 'It's a condom.' The other lady said, 'Where can you get one of those?' She said, 'Oh, just about any grocery of drug store.' So, the next day, the lady went to a local drug store, went up to the cashier, and said, 'I need to get some condoms.' The cashier looked at her puzzled (because of her age) and said, 'UH, what size?' The lady responded, 'Hmm, one that would fit a camel.'
Vote:
has 73.25 % from 382 votes. More jokes about: animal, drug, sex
Have you heard about the new "Mint flavored birth control pill" for women that they take immediately before sex? They're called "Predickamints".
Vote:
has 69.62 % from 123 votes. More jokes about: drug, sex
Valentines Day is the day that the "V" and "D" come together.
Vote:
has 67.69 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: dirty, sex, Valentines day
Q: What's the difference between a hooker and a drug dealer? A: A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again.
Vote:
has 64.84 % from 162 votes. More jokes about: drug, sex
A young Alabama man goes to a drug store and says to the pharmact: "I got a hot date tonight, an’ I need me some petection. How much is a pack a’ them rubbers gonna cost me?" The pharmacist responds: "A three-pack of condoms is $4.99 with tax." "TACKS!" the shocked redneck says. "Gawd a’ mighty, don’t they stay on by themselves!"
Vote:
has 62.98 % from 66 votes. More jokes about: dating, drug, money, sex, tax
Valentines Slogans 10. I admire your strength, I admire your spunk, But the thing I like best, is getting you drunk. 9. Our love will never become cold and hollow, Unless, one day, you refuse to swallow. 8. I bought this Valentine's card at the store, In hopes that, later, you'd be my whore. 7. This feels so good, it feels so right, I just wish it wasn't $250 a night. 6. You're a woman of style, you're a woman of class, Especially when I'm spanking, your big-round-fat ass. 5. Before I met you, my heart was so famished, But now I'm fulfilled. . . SO MAKE ME A SAMICH!!! 4. Through all the things that came to pass, Our love has grown. . . but so's your ass. 3. You're a honey. . . and you're a cutie, I just wished you had J-Lo's "booty". 2. I don't wanna be sappy or silly or corny, So right to the point, let's do it, I'm horny! 1. If you think that hickey looks like a blister. You should check out the one that I gave to your sister!
Vote:
has 47.72 % from 34 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, love, money, sex, Valentines day
Yo mama so stupid, she thought Ewoks were just Homeless Care Bears on drugs.
Vote:
has 60.15 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: drug, stupid, work, Yo mama
The phone rings at Federal Drug Enforcement Agency headquarters. "Hello?" "Hello, is this the Federal Drug Enforcement Agency?" "Yes. What can we do for you?" "I’m calling to report my neighbor Tom. He is hiding cocaine in his firewood." "Thank you, this will be noted." Next day, the Drug Enforcement agents come over to Tom’s house. They search the shed where the firewood is kept, break every piece of wood, find no cocaine, swear at Tom and leave. The phone rings at Tom’s house. "Hey, Tom! Did the Federal Drug Enforcement guys come by?" "Yeah!" "Did they chop your firewood for you?" "Yeah, they did." "Okay, now it’s YOUR turn to call. I need my garden plowed."
Vote:
has 68.60 % from 41 votes. More jokes about: cop, drug, phone
A guy walks into a post office one day to see a middle-aged, balding man standing at the counter methodically placing "Love" stamps on bright pink envelopes with hearts all over them. He then takes out a perfume bottle and starts spraying scent all over them. His curiosity getting the better of him, he goes up to the balding man and asks him what he is doing. The man says "I'm sending out 1,000 Valentine cards signed, 'Guess who?'" "But why?" asks the man. "I'm a divorce lawyer," the man replies.
Vote:
has 66.46 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: divorce, lawyer, love, Valentines day
Q: How do Columbians develop muscle? A: By pushing drugs.
Vote:
has 69.28 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: drug, ethnic, fitness