Q: What's the difference between Auschwitz and Sarajevo? A: At least they had gas in Auschwitz.
A man goes to the doctor and says "I need birth control for my 10 year old daughter" The doctor replies "She's 10 years old and sexually active?" The man says" Active? Hell no! Most of the time se just lies there and cries."
My wife and I have reached a decision that we do not want children. If anybody does please just send me your contact details and we can drop them off tomorrow.
Q: When does a pedophile go to sleep? A: When the big hand touches the small one.
Q: What do you do when you see a black man with half a face? A: Stop laughing and reload.
Why do cannibals make suitcases out of people's heads? Because they're headcases.
Doctor to Patient: "Don’t worry about your heart. It will function as long as you live."
Q: How do you fit 100 Jews in a car? A: Three in the back, two in the front and the rest in the ashtray.
An Asian walks into a McDonald's and says, "I'll Have An Eggroll and Some Fry Rye." "I'm sorry sir we don't serve that. Would you like anything else?" "I have quarter pounder. And when would you like to pick that up...Hiroshima!"
How did they know that the driver had dandruff? They found his head and shoulders in the glove box.