Joke #10272

I called that Rape Advice Line earlier today. Unfortunately, it's only for victims.
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Q: What is the difference between baby and knitting? A: Knitting is weaved by two needles and one ball, but the baby has been made with one needle and two balls!
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Q: What is the worst thing about a vegetable? A: Spitting them back up in a wheelchair.
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Q: Why are ghosts bad liars? A: Because you can see right through them!
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What's got four wheels, smokes and squeals? A bus load of babies on fire.
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"My parachute did not work." Said no one ever.
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My wife and I had been debating whether it was time to start a family when we saw a couple of cute kids, splashing and giggling in a paddling pool. I looked at her and said, "Are you thinking what I'm thinking?" She smiled and said, "Yes, Gary..." "That settles it, then," I replied. "We can't raise children if we're both paedos."
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How do you stop a baby falling down a manhole? Stick a javelin through it's head.
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Q: What is height of Suicide? A: A dwarf jumping from the footpath on the road.
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Old man: "Can you give me an erection?" Faith Healer: "I can make the blind see, make the lame walk and I can even cure cancer. But, I'm sorry I cannot raise the 'dead'."
Vote: has 79.18 % from 64 votes. Send joke:
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I was walking down the street to a video store last night to rent a porno movie when I saw a woman being raped. Saved myself a fiver.
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