I called that Rape Advice Line earlier today.
Unfortunately, it's only for victims.
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Anal sex is like your first car - you dont really want it, but your dad gave it to you anyways.
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Q: How do you make a dog go ‘miaow’?
A: Freeze it in liquid nitrogen, and run it through a bandsaw…
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What's the difference between a dead baby and a trampoline?
When you jump on a trampoline, you take your boots off.
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W: Where did Lucy go during the bombing?
A: Everywhere.
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Q: What was Hitler's favorite toy as a kid?
A: An Easy-Bake Oven.
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What happened when the cannibal bit off a missionary's ear?
He had his first taste of Christianity!
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I have to be honest, I am English myself but some of the American jokes on this site just completely ruin it for me.
I mean, what the shit happened on the ninth of November anyway?
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First Cannibal: "Have you seen the dentist?"
Second Cannibal: "Yes, he filled my teeth at dinner time."
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Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer.
Too bad he has never cried.
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Q: Why can't orphans play baseball?
A: They don't know where home is.
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