Q: Why did the boy fall off the swing?
A: He didn't have any arms.
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Use to be we had Bob Hope, Johnny Cash, and Steven Jobs.
Now we have no hope, no cash, and no jobs.
Please do not die Kevin Bacon.
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Q: How many dead babies does it take to shingle a roof?
A: Depends on how thin you slice them.
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What happened when the cannibal got a religion?
He only ate Catholics on Fridays!
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Q: Why is Al Qaeda more compassionate than pro-lifers?
A: The 9/11 hijackers got to die instantly.
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What is the difference between turkey and mother-in-law?
There is no difference: both are the best when they are cold on the table.
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A large number of Black soldiers died in Iraq war because every time their chief said:
"Get on the floor!" they stood up and started dancing.
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A Mexican and a nigga are riding in car.
Who's driving?
A cop!
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I'm so broke, I don't even get excited when I find money because I'm sure I owe it to someone.
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What's red and dances all around?
A baby on a barbecue
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First cannibal: "Come and have dinner in our but tonight."
Second cannibal: "What are you having?"
First cannibal: "Hard-boiled legs."
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