Man receives telegram: Wife dead-should be buried or cremated?
Man: Don't take any chances. Burn the body and bury the ash.
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Fred and DooDah go to their favorite lake to fish.
After getting out on the water, DooDah hooks a huge fish, which pulls him overboard, and he drowns.
Fred is brokenhearted and goes to tell DooDah's wife the news.
She opens the door and hears Fred sing:
"Guess who drowned in the lake today? DooDah! DooDah!"
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Q: What has 2 arms, 3 legs, and 4 feet?
A: The finish line at the Boston Marathon.
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Q: Who may open the door without using hands, nor legs?
A: An invalid.
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What do sick cannibals have for breakfast?
Vitamin bills!
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I'm going trick or treating with my mum tonight.
It's the only time I can take her out as she's been dead for ten years.
Q: Why are Germans bad cooks?
A: The only good one killed himself.
Mummy, mummy, why is daddy swaying in the backyard?
Shut up, and give me more bullets.
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Q: When does a pedophile go to sleep?
A: When the big hand touches the small one.
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Q: What was Hitler's favorite toy as a kid?
A: An Easy-Bake Oven.
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Q: What does FUBU really stand for?
A: Farmers used to buy us.
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