Joke #9967

What do you call a bull that's sent overseas by boat? Shipped beef.
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Question: Why did the Army send do many women with PMS to the Persian Gulf? Answer: They fought like animals and retained water for 4 days.
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A police officer sees a man driving around with a pickup truck full of penguins. He pulls the guy over and says: “You can’t drive around with penguins in this town! Take them to the zoo immediately.” The guy says OK, and drives away. The next day, the officer sees the guy still driving around with the truck full of penguins, and they’re all wearing sun glasses. He pulls the guy over and demands: “I thought I told you to take these penguins to the zoo yesterday?” The guy replies: “I did . . . today I’m taking them to the beach!”
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What do cows get when they are sick? Hay Fever.
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Chuck Norris likes his meat rare, so he eats unicorns.
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How can you tell when a skunk is angry? It raises a stink.
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What do you call a flying skunk? A smellicopter.
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Q: Why was Tigger's head in the toilet? A: He was looking for pooh!
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What US state has the most cows? Moosouri.
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How do you make a rabbit fast? Don't feed it.
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A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree," sighed the turkey, "but I haven’t got the energy." "Well, why don’t you nibble on some of my droppings?" replied the bull. "They’re packed with nutrients." The turkey pecked at a lump of dung, and found it actually gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree. The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch. Finally after a fourth night, the turkey was proudly perched at the top of the tree. He was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot him out of the tree. Moral of the story: Bull Sh*t might get you to the top, but it won’t keep you there...
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