Did you hear about the egg laden rabbit who jumps off bridges?
He's the Easter Bungee.
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Look over there! Said the frightened skunk to his pal.
"There's a human with a gun, and he's getting closer and closer! What are we going to do?"
To which the second skink calmly replied, "Let us spray ."
What did the male squirrel say when the female attacked him...
Get away from my nuts.
What's a rabbits favourite car?
Any make, just as long it's a hutchback.
"Pa's being chased by a bull!"
"Well, what in tarnation do you want me to do about it?"
"Get me some film for my camera."
Q: Why did the lion brake up with his girlfriend?
A: Cuz she was a CHEETAH!
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When Chuck Norris gets angry, forests explode from their own boiling sap.
When Chuck Norris laughs, flowers bloom and butterflies hatch.
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What happened to the cannibal lion?
He had to swallow his pride!
One day a magical frog sees a bear chasing after a rabbit for dinner.
In an attempt to bring peace to his magical forest, the frog hops up to the two and promises them 3 wishes each if they stop this violence. After both animals agreed, the frog chooses the bear to state his first wish, first.
After thinking for a while, the bear says, "I wish for all the bears in this forest to be female except me."
Next is the rabbit's turn, "I wish for a motorcycle helmet," he says.
The bear laughed, what an idiotic wish to make he thought to himself.
The bear then says, "I wish for all the bears in this country to be female except me."
The rabbit next says, "I wish for a motorcycle that requires no gas."
The bear, almost tearing from laughter, says, "You could have wished for money to get those two things!"
He then proceeds to make his final wish, after thinking for a while, he says to the frog, "I wish for all the bears in the world to be female except for me!"
He smiles smugly.
The rabit then puts on his helmet, hops on his motorcycle, grins to the bear and says, "I wish for this bear to be gay."
Teacher: If a lion is chasing you, what would you do?
Christy: I'd climb a tree.
Teacher: if the lion climbs a tree?
Christy: I will jump in the lake and swim.
Teacher: if the lion also jumps in the water and swims after you?
Christy: Teacher, are you on my side or on the lion's?