The best kids jokes

What is the difference between Michael Jackson and a grocery bag? One is white, plastic, and dangerous to children. You put groceries in the other.
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has 69.30 % from 158 votes. More jokes about: black humor, celebrity, kids, music
"I just had sexed in school today, dad! You lied to me! You told me if I have sex before my 16th biurthday, my boyfriend will die." "Oh, he will, sweetheart, he will."
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has 69.20 % from 88 votes. More jokes about: age, birthday, dad, kids, sex
Three boys are walking home from school and they see a naked woman. One of them runs away the other two stay to watch. The next day they are walking home from school and they see the naked woman again, and again the same boy runs away. Another day later they are walking home and they see the naked woman again, as the boy tries to run away the other boys grab him and ask, "What are you gay or something don't you like looking at naked women?" He replied, "Yeah, I love looking at naked women but my mom said that if I see one I'll turn into stone and I feel something starting to get hard."
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has 69.00 % from 160 votes. More jokes about: gay, kids, school, women
Q: You know what lego set Trump played with as a kid? A: The wall maker set.
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has 68.63 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: game, kids, money
If your born in September, its pretty safe to assume your parents started out the New Year with a Bang!
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has 68.61 % from 64 votes. More jokes about: birthday, kids, new year, sex
Son: "Dad, I'm cold..." Dad: "Stand in a corner, they're usually ninety degrees!"
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has 68.56 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: communication, dad, kids, science
One day little Flora was taken to have an aching tooth removed. That night, while she was saying her prayers, her mother was surprised to hear her say: "And forgive us our debts as we forgive our dentists."
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has 68.56 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: communication, dentist, kids, money, religious
A little boy was taken to the dentist. It was discovered that he had a cavity that would have to be filled. "Now, young man," asked the dentist, "what kind of filling would you like for that tooth?" "Chocolate, please," replied the youngster.
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has 68.56 % from 37 votes. More jokes about: chocolate, dentist, kids
A father was advising his son: "If you want to have a big and strong dick in future you have to eat more walnuts." Suddenly son's mother by an angry face shouted: "Why when you were child did'nt eat enough walnut yourself?"
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has 68.56 % from 97 votes. More jokes about: communication, dad, dirty, family, kids
A mother noticed her little dauther praying. "Please, God," the little girl kept saying. "Bless my father and my mother and make Melaka the capital city of Malaysia." "Why did you make such as strange request?" the mother asked. "Beacause that's what I wrote in my Geography test this morning!"
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has 68.53 % from 408 votes. More jokes about: geography, god, kids, school
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