The best kids jokes

A white boy and a black boy were arguing one day. The white boy screams "God is white!" The black boy screams "God is black!" This goes on and on for about an hour when all of a sudden there comes a loud crack of lightning and the heavens open up and a booming voice says "I am what I am." The white boy jumps up and says "See, I told you so!" To which the black boy says "How does that prove God's white?" The white boy replies "Because if God were black he would have said, "I is what I is."
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has 61.64 % from 162 votes. More jokes about: black people, communication, insulting, kids, white people
Johnny was racing around the garden on his new bicycle and called out to his mother to watch his tricks. "Look, Mum! No hands! Look, Mum! No feet! Waaah! Look, Mum! No teeth!"
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has 61.37 % from 63 votes. More jokes about: kids, little Johnny
Why would I buy a pumpkin at the store for $5 when I can drive 30 miles & pay to make my kids walk through a field to pick our own for $27.
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has 61.25 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: driving, kids, money
Little Lucy met Little Johnny after school and ask him, "Johnny do you you think I'm cute?" Little Johnny looked at her from head to toe irritably and replied. "Roses are red. Your blood is too. You look like a monkey. And belong in a zoo. Do not worry, I'll be there too. Not in the cage, But laughing at you".
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has 61.25 % from 115 votes. More jokes about: beauty, kids, little Johnny, mean, poems
Q: What's the difference between morbid and black humour? A: Well, black humour is like 10 children in one rubbish bin, whereas morbid humour is like one child in 10 rubbish bins.
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has 61.10 % from 83 votes. More jokes about: black humor, kids, morbid
Mom! I'm a 3D printer! Oh come on, Tommy, close the door when you poop.
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has 60.88 % from 68 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, kids, technology
Q: Why doesn't Smokey the bear have any kids? A: Because every time his wife gets hot, he covers her with dirt and beats her with a shovel.
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has 60.73 % from 56 votes. More jokes about: dirty, kids, wife
A little girl took her report card home and showed it to mom. The mother was very disappointed by all the very low grades. "Well look on the bright side" said the child, "you know for sure I don't cheat."
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has 60.69 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: kids, school, stupid
A man and his little boy were walking through the park when a honeybee landed near them. The boy ran over and stomped on it. The father gave him a lecture about having respect for living things and added, "Just for that you can’t have any honey for two weeks!" Pretty soon a butterfly landed near them. The boy ran over and stomped on it. Again, the father gave him a lecture and added, "Just for that you can’t have any butter for two weeks!" When they got home, they went into the kitchen, and a cockroach ran across the floor. The mother ran over and stomped on it. The boy said to his father, "Well do you want to tell her, or shall I?"
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has 60.56 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: animal, dad, kids
Chuck Norris has 2 kids. We know them as Pain and Suffering.
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has 60.24 % from 123 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, kids
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