The best kids jokes

Teacher: What's 2 and 2? Pupil: 4 Teacher: That's good. Pupil: Good? That's perfect!
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has 62.78 % from 84 votes. More jokes about: kids, math, school, student, teacher
It gives me a solution to this whole inner city gang problem that we seem to be having. I just got to get some people behind me, right? I think we need about 20 or 25 grandmothers, give them all belts and do one big drive-by whupping on these kids.
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has 62.63 % from 37 votes. More jokes about: cop, kids
Knock Knock! Who's There? Figs Figs who? Figs the doorbell, it's broken!
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has 62.37 % from 220 votes. More jokes about: kids, knock-knock
A mother and her young son were flying Southwest Airlines from Kansas City to Chicago. The son turned from the window to his mother and asked, "If big dogs have baby dogs and big cats have baby cats, why don't big planes have baby planes?" The mother said, "Well, maybe that's something you could ask the stewardess." So the boy asked the stewardess, "If big dogs have baby dogs and big cats have baby cats, why don't big planes have baby planes?" The stewardess responded, "Did your mother tell you to ask me?" The boy admitted that this was the case. "Well, then, tell your mother that there are no baby planes because Southwest always pulls out on time. You can ask your mother to explain it to you."
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has 62.19 % from 176 votes. More jokes about: airplane, cat, dog, kids, travel
Q: What did the little black boy say as he was sliding down a zebra? A: Now you see me, now you don't, now you see me, now you don't...
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has 62.10 % from 49 votes. More jokes about: black people, kids, racist
Q: Why can't orphans play baseball? A: They don't know where home is.
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has 61.95 % from 85 votes. More jokes about: black humor, kids, sport
Two men are chatting; "My son asked me: 'Daddy, where do children come from?'" "It's not a big deal... Today kids are interested in that matter on the early years." "Yeah men, but the real issue here is that my son is... married... for five years!"
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has 61.89 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: dad, kids, marriage
While I was working as a store Santa, a boy asked me for an electric train set. "If you get your train," I told him, "your dad is going to want to play with it too. Is that all right?" The boy became very quiet. So, moving the conversation along, I asked, "What else would you like Santa to bring you?" He promptly replied, "Another train."
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has 61.63 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: Christmas, communication, kids, work
Little Lucy met Little Johnny after school and ask him, "Johnny do you you think I'm cute?" Little Johnny looked at her from head to toe irritably and replied. "Roses are red. Your blood is too. You look like a monkey. And belong in a zoo. Do not worry, I'll be there too. Not in the cage, But laughing at you".
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has 61.44 % from 107 votes. More jokes about: beauty, kids, little Johnny, mean, poems
Why would I buy a pumpkin at the store for $5 when I can drive 30 miles & pay to make my kids walk through a field to pick our own for $27.
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has 61.25 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: driving, kids, money
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