Q: Why is the longest human nose on record only 11 inches Long? A: Because if it will 12 inches then it will a foot.
Chuck Norris has found what U2 are looking for.
A teller at our credit union was assisting a member with a loan application. "Do you have references?" she asked. The member replied, "Do they have to be living?"
Did you hear about the scarecrow who won the Nobel Prize? He was outstanding in his field.
Big inspection on a build site/yard. The boss tells the workers : what ever happens just act as usual. The inspection committee were inspecting when a wall just colapses. -(Worker looking at his watch) : 10:15, just on time
Did you hear about the guy they found dead with his head in his cornflakes? The police thought it was a cereal killer.
Q: How do you find Ronald McDonald in a nudist colony? A: Look for sesame seed buns.
One day, Bush was talking with Osama Binladen on the phone, they couldn’t trace from where the call was coming from, but Osama said, "I’ve got good news and bad news." Bush replied, "What’s the good news?" "I’m turning myself in," said Osama. "But the bad news is, I’m coming on a plane."
How come the village Guy Fawkes won the Nobel Peace Prize? Cause he was outstanding in his field.
Every night I play a game called "Should I pee or can I hold it till morning".