The best jokes about life

You will never have more energy or enthusiasm, hair, or brain cells than you have today.
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has 66.46 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: college, life
Patient goes to Doctor, doctor starts looking at him... - Good, good, good... - Doctor, what's good? - Good that I don't have what you have...
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has 66.45 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: doctor, health, life
Q: How is a boss better than a wife? A: A boss at least pays you for making your life miserable.
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has 66.45 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: life, management, money, wife
I hate it when you offer someone a sincere compliment about their mustache, and suddenly she is not your friend anymore...
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has 66.43 % from 63 votes. More jokes about: life
Life may not be worth living, but what else can you do with it?
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has 66.38 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: life
Programming is like sex One mistake and you have to support it for the rest of your life.
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has 66.17 % from 59 votes. More jokes about: life, programmer, sex
Life is all about mind and matter - I don't mind and You don't matter...
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has 66.10 % from 34 votes. More jokes about: life
What is Jehovah's wiseness favorite band? The Doors.
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has 65.86 % from 48 votes. More jokes about: god, life, music, religious
That awkward moment when you're about to hug someone sexy as hell and then you hit the mirror.
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has 65.84 % from 138 votes. More jokes about: life, sex
I took a day off from work to play golf. I was on the fourth hole, when I discovered a small frog sitting on the green. I paid it no attention until I heard, "Ribbit. 9-iron." That's curious, I thought, but decided to trust the frog. I pulled out a 9-iron and sunk a hole-in-one. Amazed, I picked up the frog and asked where we should go next. "Ribbit. Vegas." We went to Vegas, and I asked the frog what we should do first. "Ribbit. Roulette." We went up to the roulette table, and I won big. I took my earnings and got the best room in the hotel. I asked the frog if there was anything I could do to repay it. "Ribbit. Kiss me." I figured, what the hell, and I kissed the frog. It turned into a 15-year-old girl. That's how she ended up in my room, your Honor, and if I'm lying, my name's not R. Kelly. Tweet Share
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has 65.80 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: age, animal, golf, life, work
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