"Knock Knock?" "Who's there?" "Europe." "Europe who?" "No you're a poo."
"I really don’t know girl, but I don’t believe in love at first sight!" "Why?" "Because... How can you tell if the man has a good salary at the first sight?"
Q: How do you find Ronald McDonald in a nudist colony? A: Look for sesame seed buns.
One day, Bush was talking with Osama Binladen on the phone, they couldn’t trace from where the call was coming from, but Osama said, "I’ve got good news and bad news." Bush replied, "What’s the good news?" "I’m turning myself in," said Osama. "But the bad news is, I’m coming on a plane."
Every night I play a game called "Should I pee or can I hold it till morning".
Programming is like sex One mistake and you have to support it for the rest of your life.
Accordion to research, 9 out of 10 people don't notice when you replace words with random musical instruments.
John: "Hey can I borrow some money? I'm broke." Michael: "Get money from your job." John: "I got fired." Michael: "Why?" John: "My boss told me to leave all my problems behind the door, so I told him to stand outside." Michael: "This is why we are friends."
What do you call an intelligent man in America? A tourist.
A preacher's wife goes to the butcher. The butcher asks if she'd like to try some damn ham. The preacher's wife is shocked. The butcher explains that "Dam Ham" is the brand name of the meat and shows her the packaging with the beaver and dam logo. That night, the preacher asks, "What's for dinner?" His wife says she bought some damn ham from the butcher. The preacher scolds his wife for using such language in their home. She explains the "Dam Ham brand name and their logo. At the dinner table, the preacher asks his 16-year-old son to pass him the "Dam Ham." The son replies, "I'll pass the damn ham if you pass me the muthaf**kin' mashed potatoes."