The best love jokes

Girl: "Do you believe in puppy love?" Boy: "I tried it once, but their assholes are too small."
Vote: has 55.87 % from 36 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: black humor, dirty, dog, love, sex
Gay translation I want a commitment. I'm sick of masturbation. Haven't I seen you before? Nice ass. I need you. My hand is tired. You're the only man I've ever cared about. You are the only man who hasn't rejected me. I'm a Romantic. I'm poor. I really want to get to know you better. So I can tell my friends about it. It's just orange juice, try it. 3 more shots, and he'll have his legs around my head. He's kinda cute. I want to have sex with him till my dick turns blue! He's not my type. He won't sleep with me. I miss you so much I am so horny that my dog is starting to look good. I had a wonderful time last night. Who the hell are you? Do you love me? I've done something stupid and you might find out. Do you 'really' love me? I've done something stupid and you're going to find out. I'll give you a call. I'd rather have my nipples torn off by wild dogs than see you again. I've been thinking a lot. You're not as attractive as when I was drunk. I think we should just be friends. You're ugly. I've learned a lot from you. Next!!!!
Vote: has 55.68 % from 231 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal, gay, love, masturbation, ugly
I just love to do special things for my wife on Valentine's day. Like open the door for her when she puts all the laundry in the washing machine, or plug and unplug the vacuum as she moves from room to room cleaning. Guys, it's these little thoughtful things you can do to have a marriage such as mine.
Vote: has 55.34 % from 22 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: love, marriage, technology, Valentines day, wife
Three women talk about their husband's performance as lovers. The first woman says, "My husband is a marriage counselor, so he always buys me flowers and candy before we make love." The second woman says, "My husband is a motorcycle mechanic. He likes to play rough and use leather sometimes." The third woman shakes her head and says, "My husband works for an Internet company. He just sits on the edge of the bed and tells me how great it's going to be when I get it."
Vote: has 55.25 % from 51 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: husband, love, marriage, women
In the beautiful world of fantasy, holding hands is the first sign of true love. In college it means someone is too drunk to stand on their own.
Vote: has 54.66 % from 27 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: beauty, college, drunk, love, school
Turtle to turtle: "Don't ya just love the sound of rain on your roof?"
Vote: has 54.59 % from 16 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal, love, weather
Chuck Norris kissed a girl once. She's still blushing, we call her Sun.
Vote: has 54.59 % from 16 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: Chuck Norris, love
A dentist, an electrician, and a carpenter decide to play a practical joke their best friend on his wedding night. "I'll loosen some joints on his bed so it collapses when he's making love," says the carpenter. "I'll hot wire his mattress so they'll feel immense heat while making love," says the electrician. "Those are good ideas," says the dentist. "But my contribution's going to be a real surprise." The next day the new husband comes to the diner to meet his friends. He says "I congratulate you guys for making the bed heat up and collapse, but I'm gonna kill whichever one of you put novocaine in the massage oil!"
Vote: has 54.53 % from 70 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: love, marriage, wedding
What country do cows love to visit? Moo Zealand.
Vote: has 54.26 % from 13 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal, love
After a lengthy quarrel, a wife said to her husband, "You know, I was a fool when I married you." The husband replied: "Yes, dear, but I was in love and didn't notice it."
Vote: has 53.62 % from 49 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: husband, love, marriage, wife


<<<12131415
More jokes →
Page 12 of 15.