The best love jokes

Tow millipedes went for honey moon. The male one asked: "My darling, between which feet is your pussy, please?"
has 57.00 % from 108 votes. More jokes about: animal, dirty, love, sex, wedding
Turtle to turtle: "Don't ya just love the sound of rain on your roof?"
has 56.77 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: animal, love, weather
Without you I can't breath. I love you so much my nose.
has 56.77 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: life, love
Three women talk about their husband's performance as lovers. The first woman says, "My husband is a marriage counselor, so he always buys me flowers and candy before we make love." The second woman says, "My husband is a motorcycle mechanic. He likes to play rough and use leather sometimes." The third woman shakes her head and says, "My husband works for an Internet company. He just sits on the edge of the bed and tells me how great it's going to be when I get it."
has 56.57 % from 58 votes. More jokes about: husband, love, marriage, women
A fellow was very much in love with a beautiful girl. One day she told him that the next day was her birthday. He told her he would send her a bouquet of roses... one for each year of her life. That evening he called the local florist and ordered twenty-one roses with instructions that they be delivered first thing the next morning. As the florist was preparing the order, he decided that since the young man was such a good customer, he would put an extra dozen roses in the bouquet. The fellow never did find out what made the young girl so angry with him.
has 56.31 % from 68 votes. More jokes about: beauty, birthday, life, love, marriage
A professor and a doctor both love the same girl. Each one tries to get rid of the other. Once, it so happened that the professor had travel out of the country for a week. Before leaving, he gave his girlfriend seven apples and asked her to eat one every day while he was not there. When asked why, he replied,"Because an apple a day keeps the doctor away."
has 56.05 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: communication, doctor, food, love, teacher
Son: "What's love juice daddy?" Me: "It's what 2 people make when they're having exciting sex. Anyway? What are you watching?" Son: "Wimbledon."
has 55.91 % from 44 votes. More jokes about: dad, love, sex, sport
A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than he loves himself.
has 55.51 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: animal, love
A lady calls the police to report her husband is missing. The police arrive and ask for a description. She tells them he's 6 foot 2 inches tall, blonde wavy hair and has a smile that makes everybody love him. The police then go to the next door neighbor to verify this report and the lady next door tells the police, "You can't believe her. He's 5 foot 4 inches tall, has no hair and he wears a perpetual frown on his face." The neighbor then goes and asks the lady why she gave the police such a false report. She replies, "Just because I reported him missing, doesn't mean I wanted him back!"
has 55.34 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: cop, love, men
Knock knock. Who's there? Kenya. Kenya who? Keeeenya feeel the loooove tonight?
has 54.49 % from 45 votes. More jokes about: knock-knock, love, music
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