The best math jokes

Teacher: "Now class, whatever I ask, I want you to all answer at once. How much is six plus four?" Class: "At once!"
Vote:
has 76.56 % from 724 votes. More jokes about: math, school, teacher
I used to think maths was useless, but then one day I realised that decimals had a point.
Vote:
has 76.53 % from 478 votes. More jokes about: math
A lawyer, an engineer and a mathematician were called in for a test. The engineer went in first and was asked, "What is 2+2?" The engineer thought awhile and finally answered, "4." Then the mathemetician was called in and was asked the same question. With little thought he replied, "4.0" Then the lawyer was called in, and was asked the same question. The lawyer answered even quicker than the mathematician, "What do you want it to be?"
Vote:
has 75.94 % from 90 votes. More jokes about: lawyer, math
Teacher: "Little Johnny, give me a sentence using the word, 'geometry.'" Little Johnny: "A little acorn grew and grew until it finally awoke one day and said, 'Gee, I'm a tree.'"
Vote:
has 75.65 % from 233 votes. More jokes about: little Johnny, math, teacher
Johnny, if you had 5$ and you asked your father for 3$ more, how many dollars would you have? I would have five dollars... You don't know your arithmetic, Johnny... You don't know my father, Mrs. Mutch...
Vote:
has 75.39 % from 512 votes. More jokes about: little Johnny, math, money
The teacher asked little Johnny, “What’s two and two?”. He counted 1-2-3-4 on his fingers and said, “Four, teacher?”. She said, ” Yes, that’s right, but you counted on your fingers. Put your hands behind behind your back and tell me what’s three and three”. He put his hands behind his back, fumbled around, and answered, “Six, teacher?”. She said, “Yes, that’s right, but you’re still counting on your fingers. Put your hands in your pockets and tell me what’s five and five”. He put his hands in his pockets, fumbled around, and replied, “Eleven, teacher?”.
Vote:
has 74.84 % from 269 votes. More jokes about: little Johnny, math, teacher, time
I came here to do 2 things: work on my math skills.
Vote:
has 74.14 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: math, work
What is 6.9? A great thing ruined by a period.
Vote:
has 74.00 % from 123 votes. More jokes about: math, sex
A team of engineers were required to measure the height of a flag pole. They only had a measuring tape, and were getting quite frustrated trying to keep the tape along the pole. It kept falling down, etc. A mathematician comes along, finds out their problem, and proceeds to remove the pole from the ground and measure it easily. When he leaves, one engineer says to the other: "Just like a mathematician! We need to know the height, and he gives us the length!"
Vote:
has 73.90 % from 78 votes. More jokes about: math
Welcome to the accounting department, where everybody counts.
Vote:
has 72.95 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: accountant, math, work
<<<3456
More jokes →
Page 3 of 18.