The best mean jokes

I was sat with my wife while she sipped on her glass of wine, when she said, "I love you so much, you know. I don't know how I could ever live without you." I said, "Is that you or the wine talking?" She said, "It's me talking to the wine.
has 82.69 % from 40 votes. More jokes about: communication, love, mean, wife, wine
I play the worlds most dangerous sport. I disagree with my wife.
has 82.28 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: communication, marriage, mean, sport, wife
Wife: "Give me some money. I want to buy a bra." Husband: "Why? You have nothing to put in it!" Wife: "You wear shorts!"
has 82.02 % from 46 votes. More jokes about: beauty, communication, marriage, mean, money
Husband: "Right now, for this Women's Day, I am going to make you the happiest woman in the world!" Wife: "Oh dear, I will miss you!"
has 81.83 % from 67 votes. More jokes about: holiday, marriage, mean, women
There are two essential rules to management. First, the customer is always right. Second, they must be punished for their arrogance.
has 81.77 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: customer service, management, mean
When Chuck Norris comes into your house, you are the guest.
has 81.43 % from 79 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, mean
I just wanted you to know that somebody cares. Not me, but somebody does.
has 81.28 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: mean
Behind every successful man is a surprised woman.
has 81.28 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: life, mean, men, women
I never knew happiness till I got married. By then it was too late.
has 81.28 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: marriage, mean, time
Susan's mother: "What are you doing on the top of that tree?" Susan: "Some boys are playing football their ball is fallen on the tree. They asked me to bring it." Susan's mother: "My dear , they only want to chech your pants." Susan: "Don't worry mam, I hav'nt put on my pants!"
has 80.94 % from 57 votes. More jokes about: dirty, football, kids, mean
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